Foolish Hypocrites

Only a fool buys a piece of candy, eats the wrapper and throws away the candy. This is the kind of foolishness Jesus observed in the religious leaders of his time. They got lost in the non-essentials, in the trappings of human tradition.

It proofs how even religion can easily turn into a whole set of obligations to be followed unintelligent. Sometimes we come to the point when we probably do not even know anymore what we are doing it all for. But we keep doing it out of fear.

Reflection on Mk 7:1-8, 14-15, 21-23

God’s people got off track sometimes. They put tremendous emphasis on doing all their religious observances and practices correctly- like washing hands and purifying vessels so as to put them to good and holy use- but they lost a sense of what is all about, which was faith in their God. This was evident because they became unjust, and exploited poor people.

At such times prophets would speak up on behalf of God, telling the people in loud and ways that their religious practices were worthless without faith in God.

When we feel something deeply, we have to express that feeling. For instance, if we want to encourage somebody during the one-week events in the intramurals, we may applaud and cheer. If we care a lot about some people, we may hug them, kiss them, or give them gifts. If we feel angry, we may scream and pound the wall. But someone else might express love in a different way- through a smile, a pat on the back, affectionate teasing.

And think of it the way around. Have you ever know a person who act “mushy” with everyone hugging and acting affectionate all the time, but somehow doesn’t feel genuine? This is like religious practices that do not express genuine faith. If faith is not present, religious expressions have no basis and will eventually become meaningless, empty, and boring. Such practices were hypocritical, and at times they are.

“Father in heaven, cleanse our attitudes, thoughts, and actions. Teach us the wisdom to strive holiness in our lives”

Amen

Our Heart Is Restless

Memorial of Saint Augustine, bishop, confessor and doctor

More than fifteen hundred years ago, a young man from northern Africa was studying in Italy. He was leading in a turbulent life, getting into all kinds of trouble and making his mother sick worry about how he would “turn out”. But he had something quite wonderful going for him: he was a searcher. He knew he was longing for happiness, and he knew that no matter how much he tried to find it (in all wrong places), he came up short of real happiness. It was beyond his grasp. But he kept searching.

At last, partly through a wise teacher who introduced him to a new spiritual vision of life, this young man turned his life around and became a Christian. Years later, in his autobiography, he reflected prayerfully on what he had learned through all his searching. Addressing God, Augustine wrote: “You have made us for yourself, and our heart is restless until it rest in you.”

Ultimately we are made for union with God in this life and forever. All our longings for happiness point finally to the One who created us out of love and set us forth on this restless, joyous, wonder-filled journey of life. The young man who recognized this was Augustine, who was later named bishop and, after his death, a saint. Today he is considered one of the greatest thinkers and leaders in the history of Christianity. And it all began for him with him with a young man’s searching heart.

St. Augustine of Hippo is the patron of brewers because of his conversion from a former life of loose living, which included parties, entertainment, and worldly ambitions. His complete turnaround and conversion has been an inspiration to many who struggle with a particular vice or habit they long to break.

Much is known about his life but here are ten facts you might not know about him.

1. Augusta, FL is named after St. Augustine and Santa Monica, CA is named after his mother.
2. Augustine was baptized by St. Ambrose in Milan at the Easter Vigil in 387.
3. His words are quoted in St. Thomas Aquinas’ writings on nearly every page.
4. His mother, Monica, is buried in the church of St. Augustine in Rome.
5. Augustine spent his life fighting the great heresies of the Manicheans, Pelagians, Arians, and Donatists.
6. Augustine did not want to be a bishop so he avoided going to towns where a bishop was needed. He founded his monastery in Hippo where Valerius was bishop, but was immediately made his auxiliary bishop.
7. He worked with St. Jerome on the New Testament Vulgate and is largely responsible for the inclusion of Hebrews and Revelations into the Bible.
8. He was the first theologian to say that men and women were both equal and made in the image of God.
9. Augustine taught in North Africa, Rome and Milan.
10. He published nearly 5 million words before the printing press.

“Too late have I loved you, O Beauty of ancient days, yet ever new! Too late I loved you! And behold, you were within, and I abroad, and there I searched for you; I was deformed, plunging amid those fair forms, which you had made. You were with me, but I was not with you. Things held me far from you—things which, if they were not in you, were not at all. You called, and shouted, and burst my deafness. You flashed and shone, and scattered my blindness. You breathed odors and I drew in breath—and I pant for you. I tasted, and I hunger and thirst. You touched me, and I burned for your peace” (St. Augustine, Confessions).

Leaving Home to Pursue My Dream

I begin after a short time of trying to be quiet. The silence feels good, but my head is full of racket. I wonder how to turn it off. Questions keep knocking at my door: Am I really going crazy? Am I being deluded by idea of entering priesthood? What do I hope to gain by it all?

Maybe I should listen to my family and relatives, and “come to my senses”, being content with the “good” life I have. Why can’t I be like other people and be satisfied with the usual after-school activities – online gaming, hanging with friends, and some hobby?

I had second thoughts about leaving home to pursue my dream. Well, it’s not all uncommon: Leaving a comfortable life and familiar habits isn’t an easy decision to make. The reality of taking up a journey always leads to serious questions.

Do you think it’s admirable to leave home and pursue our dreams with uncertainty that we will actually make them come true?

I’m the kind of person who believes: I should always pursue my dream, because I may never get the chance and then I’ll wonder what would have happened if I actually did. And even if I don’t make it, at least I’ve tried.

It’s always hard to leave stability when we’re unsure of the outcome, but we have to do it someday if we want to pursue our dreams. Sometimes taking a risk to seek happiness is well worth the fight. Weigh our options, determine if we’ll be able to live with a pay cut and then make our decision. We only get to live once.

Yeah, I have done something stupid. But look at anyone who took a chance at their dreams, and ten times out of ten at the time their choice seemed pretty stupid too, and yet it paid off be it in the form of fame or personal satisfaction. I can always go back to college if things don’t work out!

I will have fun exploring my dreams–it will be worthwhile even if I “fail.”

Praying Is Wrestling

The seminary is not always a pleasant place to stay. Our littleness and our inabilities usually come to the surface when we are left alone. As it says, ‘Who can sit still while the mud settles?’ Prayer itself can be a hard experience. I sit here and listening and what do I hear? Nothing but my own agitation. There isn’t a book on prayer among any of the books I borrowed from the library, yet everyone in them prays! I need to take some lessons or something…

I wanted more time here, so I spent last night alone. Read some; take a nap, sat in silence: nothing! Tried to pray! Must I pray for the grace to pray? Again I feel the frustration of my feeble attempts to communicate with Him. It’s a one-way street.

I keep expecting something yet I wonder if I’m wasting my time. It seems so unproductive- all these days, and now a night, in solitude. No way to evaluate my growth, if there is any. I seem to lost my way or hit a plateau. Something is going on inside, but I certainly don’t seem to be going anywhere. How hard it is to “sit quietly while the mud settles”. And this morning I awoke with a sore back and stiff neck.

If I want to continue the quest, that means I must learn to be a wrestler. I need to wrestle the important questions in my life. I have to wrestle with in my self and I must wrestle with God as well. And when I do, I will end up as I did this morning- with a sore back and a stiff neck.

I can’t wrestle God or confront the way I live with what I believe without being wounded, as Jacob was in the Bible. But the point is that these days, are time of great change. One must face the moral conflicts of the day and continue on an honest quest for happiness. If we are faithful to our times of silence, we will hear the voice within that calls us to truth. Even if all the rest of the world denies it, we will have the courage to live out what our conscience tells us the truth.

I had made it such a heavy problem; it seems so easy, though perhaps living it out will require effort. But at least I now have the solution to work toward. Day has ended, and I feel much better. I will try to trust that all my life is prayer.

Christian Values, Epitome for Change

Cor Jesu Seminary holds its annual intramurals with a one-week opening. Declamation and Balak are the first contest to spark up the week. The CJS community was divided into 5 BEC’s; Thales, Heraclitus. Anaximander, Anaximenes, and Democritus (the new BEC). The alagad of Democritus had chosen me to be the competitor in declamation. At first I was hesitant of accepting the offer, yet at the end looks like my alibis didn’t work (gulp).

I was the 2^nd contestant (sweatdrop). I told myself to calm down and relaxed… Prove  you’re worth Khim!

I feel that this is the most challenging and most significant problem of our country today… Christian values.

It cannot be denied that our family units are the basic foundation of our value formation- especially Christian values.

The family has always been the vital unit of our society- like all other societies. The units of family exist today even when you go out into the whole structure of the country. People think in terms of families here. The top people who own a great amount of wealth of the country belong to a very limited number of families.

Think of business enterprises, or even government programs and economic development, and you will find they are grounded upon family structures. Then, have you thought that the worst enemy of our society is ourselves?

How do we vanquish the enemy? My friends, if you want this country to progress, we have to declare war on our enemies- war on ourselves. But it is not enough to feel passionately about ourselves. It is very important that we must have a will to sincerely change- an ideology embedded within us: an ideology spelled out clearly to be accepted by all our people; translated into simplest terms so that we can feel the entire nation to rally behind this ideology! Not rally on the streets, with sticks and stones and even guns and goons! Not rally on big companies, on government enterprises or on private offices with bombs and grenades- because we do not have food on our table or tuition fees for our children.

We have the most beautiful; so to speak, government on earth- a government “of the people, by the people, and for the people”- would you then aim for the destruction of this ideology?- “a destruction, without realization, this government shall perish from the earth?” We are an instinctively ambitious nation- embodied by a driven society. However, should we take a pause and think? Are we ambitious for the right reasons? Are we driven to progress by the apposite values?

The Filipino family in general considers children as blessings given to us by God. We look upon them as gifts and at the same time, as God-given tasks. I would like to think that for every normal family, each child is a precious gift that is welcomed with joy.

At times we think of the school as the only agency that can successfully educate our children in faith. After all, they have religion or catechesis and they have priests and nuns to minister the sacraments to them. But the school cannot replace the Christian family in the field of education in instilling in the children Christian values- Christian values in the light of our faith- Christian values modeled by our parents- Christian values actualized by the members of our family. Indeed, the school and even the church are effective avenues in the facilitation of values formation. However, the core of the entire dynamics of values is, undeniably, the family. Now, I believe, that it is irrefutable.

The task of giving education is rooted in the primary vocation of married couples to anticipate in God’s creative activity: by begetting in love and for love, a new person who has within himself or herself the vocation to growth and development. Parents by that very fact take on the task of helping that person effectively live a fully human life; a life anchored on Christian values!

The right and duty of parents to give education is essential; it is connected with the transmission of human life; it is original and primary with regards to the educational role of others- on account of uniqueness of the loving relationship between parents and children; it is irreplaceable, inalienable, and therefore incapable of being entirely delegated to others and usurped by others!

Every society hopes and expects that children will grow up to be capable and responsible citizens who will contribute to the well- being of their communities. Yet, around the world, children are denied the rights that would enable them to survive, to develop fully, and to participate actively. Children, whose basic and fundamental rights are robbed from them because of the lack of Christian values, cannot be expected to change, to mature into caring, productive adults- adults who will respect the rights of others. Its an unfathomable reality, but as the quality of the family disintegrates, the individual, the child is sacrificed.

Rights violations are not only cause of personal sufferings, they also sow the seeds for political and social unrest! It is ironic how we are trapped in a cycle that we have created. But come to think of it, we can entangle ourselves from such deterioration because we, in fact, have caused it. It is not an impossible feat. Christian values need not be scholastic but rather pragmatic.

Therefore, can you, as adults become the instruments for change? Can you, as adults, sow the seeds of Christian values to our children? Can you, as adults, in our beautiful yet faltering Filipino society, serve as the epitome of values to the young?

These questions, my august audience: I challenge you!

After the contest, I was ranked 4^th, because one of the judges commented that my presentation is for oration (whhaaaaatttt?). But it’s Ok- nobody goes defeated all the time (wink). Winning is great, sure, but If I can pick up after a crushing defeat, and go on to win again; I’m going to be the champion someday! (grin)

“Regardless of how we feel inside, always try to look like a winner. Even if we are behind, a sustained of control and confidence can give us a mental edge that results in victory”

Heaven’s Passport

Words and meanings are two things that are not always easy to bring together. Not everyone hears the words picks up the meaning. Obviously, not everyone who hears listens, and not everyone who listens understands.

Reflection on Jn 6:60-69

“This language is very hard! Who can accept it? – Jews

God’s invitation and our response are not a matter of “Just sign up here and you’ll never be confused again” or “A trouble-free life, guaranteed.” On the contrary, the deepest kind of faith is the kind that has been struggled over and that has held up, even though all the answers have not been provided in a neat package.

How many people we know who settle for something less than eternal life? How many content themselves with less luxuries and the sense of being a part of a group? But, despite our doubts, we are not satisfied with life as it has been. We are worried that we can’t lose ourselves in pursuit that other people find so rewarding.

I was born believing in God, my mom never fails to remind me that He is real. And God always make me feel His presence especially on those times that I’m beginning to question His existence. I’m one of those living proofs that He really makes a way when there seems to be no way. As my mom says, “If He doesn’t give what you want now, maybe it will do you no good, or He has better plans for you. Or, being God that He is, He will give it to you in His time. It has been nothing but a positive influence in my life. God has always been here for me and I’ve always felt loved. When things go wrong, it’s like having a Father you can lean on and it makes me feel secure.

I have my passport heavenly stamped, absolutely!

“Father, we easily lose perspective in life when unexpected things happen. Teach us to be good disciples of Jesus and to learn for Him every time”

Amen

Journey With Our Wounds

I begin my journal writing just after I entered here in seminary. I wish to record the events that led up to this date. My story began several months ago when I began to feel an explainable urge to accept God’s call and set out on a spiritual journey. I felt a surge of excitement. Indeed, it was a great adventure to be on a quest.

I have been slain a thousand times, but I have risen again. These old wounds are the source of my power and might. Our greatest and worst enemies are not monsters who roam the forest or even wicked witches and evil wizards. No, it is our scars, our wounds and old injuries that we fear. As we journey through life we all have injured- hurt by parents, brothers or sisters, schoolmates, strangers, lovers, teachers…the possible list of the guilty is long. Our wounds speak, however, with crooked voices because of the scars. All of us have wounds- old ones and new ones. How can our wounds become our source of power?

First, we must not give in to the voice of our scars, the voice of the times we trusted and were betrayed, loved and were rejected, did our best and laughed at. Do not give weight to the scars left because we were slighted or were made to fell less than others. Instead, when those voice call to you to react with envious or jealous feelings, do exactly the opposite. When they say, ‘run away’ you must stay. When they say ‘distance your self’ then move closer. We must transform their power and not destroy it!

All quests begin with some question. Great quests begin naturally with great questions; ‘Why am I not happy?’ ‘Why do I want to be a priest?’ ‘How do I find happiness?’ That’s what we’re questing for happiness. And happiness, health, holiness, and all the rest come only when we have made our injuries into glorious wounds.

“Hello stranger. You look like you’re lost. Can I be of any assistance?” asked the man in a voice tinged with tiredness.

I stopped dead in my tracks, “Well, er… Yes, I am lost, I must confess. But I am on a quest, you see, and from all I have read it seems that people who are on a quest are frequently lost.”

Jesus’ Real Body & Blood

Ancient Anxanum, the city of the Frentanese, has contained for twelve centuries the first and greatest Eucharistic Miracle of the Catholic Church. This wondrous event took place in the 8^th century A.D. in the little Church of St. Legontian, as a divine response to a Basilian monk doubt about Jesus’ real presence in the Eucharist.

During Holy Mass, after the two-fold consecration, the host was change d into live Flesh and the wine was changed into live Blood, which coagulated into five globules, irregular and differing shape and size. The Host-Flesh, as can be very distinctly observe today, has the same dimensions as the large host used today in the Latin Church; it is light brown and appears rose colored when lighted from the back. The Blood is coagulated and has earthy color resembling the yellow ocher.

Reflection on Jn 6: 51-58

Why settle for junk food when you can have a full nourishing meal with only a little more effort? Why drink instant coffee when you can have a real brewed coffee if only you can wait a while? Why watch a film on TV when you can see it on a wide screen? Why settle on a poor substitute when you can have a real thing?

In the Old Testament, the term “flesh and blood” refers to human life. Thus, to eat Jesus’ flesh and to drink His blood is accept the whole living Jesus. By His “flesh” Jesus means His word. To eat His flesh naturally means to live in His words, and to be nourished and strengthened by them. His blood was offered for forgiveness of sins. To drink His “blood” means to repent and to forgive. Since Jesus assumed unto Himself all human beings- to accept Him, therefore, implies to accept all He assumed. Jesus himself as a good master went to the extent of giving His body and blood to teach us the real dimension of sharing.

The fountain of youth, the Holy Grail, ambrosia and red nectar, the tree of life, etc. – these are just some of literary representations of the basic human quest for lasting happiness, for eternity, for here after and beyond. We do not have to go very far or wait until after death to know what eternal life is all about. The gospel entails us that only Jesus’ body and blood can give us eternal life. Indeed, no miracle is possible for those who refuse to believe.

“Heavenly Father, thank you for the gifts of life and for everything that sustains it. Give us faith that makes us share these gifts joyfully to others”

Amen

Soar On Eagle’s Wings

Dear God,

Okay, I’m about to either explode or collapse. I just can’t take it anymore! I’ve got midterm exam this week. I’ve gotten two of them over with, but I still have the worst four to go. That’s enough all by myself, but then Wednesday morning, Fr. Ian told us to summarize a book from the Old Testament as our midterm exam. My entire batch got one book to summarize while mine were two books (1&2 Chronicles). Others have small chapters while mine were 65 chapters (sigh). And Fr. Jag told me to pass articles for the Cordial (official publication of CJS). I need to make a dialogue for our Communication Arts class. I’ve been chosen also to be the representative in declamation (for the opening of our intramurals) – so I have to memorize my two-page declamation piece within one week. How I wish that there’s no more arnis class during Tuesdays. I got only naps every night because of this demands (yawn).

Even just telling you this helps me a little. When I tell you, I feel like you’re on my side and you’ll help me figure it out. I need to calm down and think straight and decide what’s really the most important and what I can skip or put off. Maybe I can talk to the Formators, maam Porlas, and my BEC mates, too.

My uncle’s favorite passage from the bible just popped into my head. I read it from the back part of their family picture when he was just 4 years old then.

“Those who wait for the Lord

shall renew their strength,

they shall mount up with wings like eagles,

they shall run and not be weary

they shall walk and not faint.”

Oh, God, help me with feeling so wiped out and panicky. And take care of my uncle. Let us both fly like eagles!

Tiredly,

Khim

I Want To Be A St!

I’m spending some time in quite solitude, trying to sit as simply as possible with all my questions taunting me. I feel I need to create enough space inside to hear the voice of guidance.

I just briefly want to record something that happened last night. In one clear moment I caught a glimpse of what being a real servant means. Most of us get buried by the weight of the garbage of others before we become radiant through our service.

It’s hard enough to own my own hate and anger, prejudices and petty discrimination, but to be expected to own the sinfulness of others doesn’t seems fair. Why should I have to take the dirt of those who sexually abuse children, who lie, cheat and murder, who keep the poor chained to poverty?

But in that moment I really saw the great love of Jesus which bears the sins and troubles of everyone. I could feel the great measure of love necessary to understand servanthood. I had a vision of Uncle Rover as old and ill, and in that moment I understood the glorious gift it can be to care for a loved one made feeble by age. I was held by such great love that I was not weighed down by the burden of that care. It was a wonderful moment, and I still feel its effects, but I’m not sure it made my decision of staying here easier.

Only if I will be able to bear the title “St.” with honesty. Until I would not have been able to understand that those initials stand not only for Sent or Saint, but also for the most mysterious of all titles- Servant.

Only when I am able to see that I am more than an isolated individual, that I am a part of everyone, will enable me to find my purpose.

One of the most amazing things ever said on this earth is Jesus’ statement: “He that is greatest among you shall be your servant.”